In praise of... becoming a nun

The other day, as I waited for my train, this advert stared at me across the rails, stirring memories and irritation in equal measure. 

Memories... of being young and of  giving up dating and, a couple of years later, freely, gladly becoming a nun. Memories of romance and relationship, and falling in love - all achieved despite a complete lack of dating apps in the 1980s. And then all that stopped: not because I lacked an app, but because I had fallen in love with God; or rather, because I had come to know myself to be loved, unconditionally and without limits by God, who called me to a response I could not refuse.  

I didn't enter religious life immediately: recognising God's call and then eventually finding and discerning with the Society took me a while - but I did, as Bumble would no doubt say, somewhat archly, 'start living like a nun'.  Though there was more to this than simply not having a boyfriend! I was seeking to centre myself in God, to prioritise prayer, become less materialistic; to read scripture and listen to God's calls, and align myself more with his values... But yes, I didn't have a boyfriend: not because I couldn't find love... rather, it was because I had found a Love infinitely greater and far more sublime than any another love; I'd found a Love - the Love - which is the source of all love. Now it was Jesus who captivated me; Jesus who became 'my other half' and my completion; Jesus with whom I longed to spend my life.

No more dating... but oh, so much, much more!

Memories... and irritation, at the advert's implied negativity about my life. Becoming a nun was certainly not a punishment, or an act of desperation born of dejected loneliness: it was, and remains, a tremendous joy - a joy which has grown and deepened over the past thirty years. And that's how it will be for any woman called to religious life. It can be challenging and difficult at times - as can any other way of life: there will be times of heartache and sacrifice; but fundamentally, it is a journey of constant encounter with God, containing grace and growth, opportunities for service and self-giving, fulfillment and a fullness of life I could never have imagined thirty years ago. Whatever else people might imagine, becoming a nun is horizon- and heart-expanding, not heart-shrinking, and, far from being loveless, our vowed celibate chastity enables us to love more, and to love freely and widely. 

And if becoming a nun is indeed God's dream for a woman, she won't regret giving all her love to the One who has loved and cherished her since forever, and whose faithful love is strong and everlasting. She won't regret giving up on dating, and becoming a nun...